September 2025

In attendance this month were Sonia Featherstone (still valiantly in the Chair), Constance Dilmore, Alfred Bushwell, Gerard Savin, Joe Halton, Eleanora Reingold, and yours truly. Thank you to Mina Goodacre for allowing us to hold our meeting in the Bookish Barista.

This month’s gathering of the Welston Book Worms covered Simon Brett’s The Body on the Beach, a cosy mystery set in Fethering. Much like Welston, Fethering has a Sea View Road, though I suspect our pub, the Slippery Eel, serves a better pint than Brett’s Crown and Anchor.

Sonia, our Chair, began the meeting by asking whether Brett’s sleepy seaside backdrop rang true. But before anyone could answer, Constance mounted a campaign against one of Brett’s main characters, Carole Seddon, claiming the poor woman was clearly the invention of a man who had no business writing about older women.

Joe, who as far as I know has yet to read beyond Chapter Three of anything, countered with his usual film commentary. He praised The Thursday Murder Club and Chris Columbus’s directing career, which he seems to know better than Brett’s book. Alfred, affronted, reminded Joe (and the rest of us) that the Netflix film diverged outrageously from Osman’s text. He then segued into his usual speech about Ridley Scott’s Napoleon, which he considers a crime against history.

Gerard, bless him, hadn’t read Brett either, but admitted the Netflix film’s ending left him teary. He then asked if anyone else had ever felt sorry for a murderer. (No takers, though Sonia looked ready to throttle someone.)

At this point, Eleanora—the club’s self-appointed guardian of bylaws—produced the laminated rule sheet. She pointed out that fewer than half of us had read the book, which required the meeting’s adjournment.

Sonia looked stricken.

Just then, Mina Goodacre appeared with a tray of free leftovers.

‘Well,’ I said, ‘if we can’t discuss the book, perhaps we can review the pastries.’

With the Barista about to close and a tray of pastries hanging in the balance, Eleanora (Keeper of the Laminated Rules) relented. A quick vote was taken, and it was agreed unanimously that we’d postpone the Body on the Beach discussion until another meeting.

Thus, the evening was saved, although I can’t promise Simon Brett would have approved of our methods.